Unstuck to Unstoppable: Healing Trauma to Lead Boldly in Business and Life

Have you ever felt like no matter how much you accomplish, something is still holding you back?

You show up strong for others. You lead. You serve. You build businesses, raise families, and keep moving forward… but deep inside, there’s a silent struggle—one that keeps you stuck in cycles of burnout, doubt, or playing small.

I’ve been there.
And if I’m being real, trauma—especially the kind we don’t talk about—has a sneaky way of showing up in how we lead, love, and live. I tell people now that I became a professional supressor. During the course of my life, I was able to suppress trauma because our brains have a way of protecting us from our trauma. This is great until it's not. At the age of 43, I found myself unraveling. It didn't matter how much I tried to accomplish, it just never seemed to work out. I began my faith journey just two years earlier, but I had not fully embraced the power of healing. I needed to face my traumas so I could heal through every event that I endured from childhood into adulthood - in the military and outside of the military. 

As a speaker, business owner, coach, veteran, and trauma survivor, I’ve seen firsthand how unprocessed pain shows up in leadership. But I’ve also witnessed what happens when we surrender our healing to God and give our subconscious the space to release what no longer serves us. This is why I am able to share on such a deep level. I have something that book knowledge can't teach us - experience. My experiences over time led me to break down, but with God, the new foundation was built and I am being built up into the person He desires me to be. This is where I want to see everyone get to! We deserve to be mentally free! God calls us and THEN He equips us. We go through so that we can have a strong testimonial that shows doubters what God can do when we allow Him to. It's amazing!

This is where the real transformation begins. The process is lonely, confusing, and challenging, but coming out on the other side of it is beautiful. As we know, life itself is a journey and the journey doesn't stop until we take our last breath. The more we endure, the more resilient we become. The more we believe, the stronger our Faith muscle gets. The more we focus on rewiring our subconscious, the more we can retrain our old habits and become the true version of ourselves that is unstoppable and able to lead at levels we maybe never imagined. 

As many of you know, my journey as a coach began as a basketball player, where I coached on the floor, then a true coach, personal trainer/nutritionish, and group fitness instructor where I taught adults and kids for years. Nevertheless, my true calling is where I am stepping into now - coaching at a higher level. I now know that if I can help our leaders become better versions of themselves, I am helping those they lead. Some of those people become great leaders and it just continues on for generations. It's beautiful. I also know some of the many things I have endured as an employee and business owner, especially as a mom also. There is so much we don't talk about - but maybe we should. Healing begins when we talk, not when we hide. It's time to heal!

The Hidden Cost of Unhealed Trauma in Business and Leadership

Many high-performing leaders unknowingly operate from trauma responses. We become people-pleasers, perfectionists, overachievers—believing that staying busy and producing more will somehow quiet the unrest inside. I lived this for so long. Check out my blogs on survival mode and people pleasing to gain more insight and tips on how to begin creating healthy boundaries. These are things I have experienced a lot in my life and now I want to share in hopes you don't have to keep living like I was. 

I can personally attest that living this way absolutely does NOT serve us in the long run.
Eventually, the unresolved wounds catch up to us:

• We react instead of respond - I can remember a client I had in Okinawa who complained a lot about the coaching I provided. This was back in 2016 or so. I was working on my master's degree and starting a company. I was trying to learn an app I just bought into that helped me track progress, but she simply did not want to input her pictures into the app even though I needed her to so I could calculate her nutrition requirements more effectively. Long story short, I remember sending an email and her reacting to my email and me reacting back. I finally asked if we could talk in person, but I remember that so vividly. I was not helping the issue. I was not intentially listening. I wanted her to buy into my needs instead of listening to hers. 

• We self-sabotage when new opportunities arise. I could write about this for days. I literally could write an entire book just on this one key point. I have done this up until very recently and I still have to work through it on a daily basis. It's that feeling that we're going to mess it up. We don't even give ourselves a shot. We just give up on it before we even begin. Does this sound familiar? It wasn't until I experienced the Cortina Method that helped me get unstuck subconsciously that I finally began to break through this cycle. I still have to work through it, but the good thing now is I am much more self-aware. The issue is that when we are operating blindly, we do this without being aware of it. We can't work on it if we don't know it exists. A way to find out is ask people who know you. Do you ever notice that I do this? Ask them. Then don't be upset by their answer. Now, if they feel the need to over-explain, you can simply let them know that a simple yes or no answer will suffice, but ask. People around you notice things you don't notice. This is the beauty of community and collaboration. This is why I enjoy having everyone inside Convene Communities and building something great together. We can be open and honest with each other inside the safe space. It isn't like social media, where people will come on and blast you for being vulnerable. Inside my community, we honor vulnerability. This is where true transformation begins. 

• We carry guilt, shame, or fear into every room we walk into. Ah yes, another cycle that needs to be broken. During my time in Neuroemotional Technique, a type of non-diagnostic therapy that uses the body to tell the story (see https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2646715/), I found out that my shame and guilt was genetic. It was passed down from generation to generation. Most of us have probably heard about generational trauma. What came out of my sessions was information I was unaware of since most everyone in my family line is either deceased (mom, grandmother, grandfather) or non-existent (father). I learned a lot through my time in NET. It taught me one thing that I needed to know - that I was carrying generational things and that's another reason why my conscious mind was struggling to reprogram. Sometimes, it's these deep-rooted things we need to be aware of. Otherwise, we are unable to begin making positive changes. Again, self-awareness is the key to change. If you begin to notice that many people around you "have issues," I encourage you to begin the journey of turning the mirror around. If you need assistance and accountability, you have come to the right place. This is how our journey to leading authentically begins. 

Here’s the truth:

We can't lead others well if we’re secretly leading from a place of survival. I promise you, I tried for many years. While I was mostly successful for a long time, I ended up hitting a brick wall at one point. I was burnt out and depressed. I felt like I didn't even know myself - because I didn't. As leaders, how can we fully step up to the plate if we are internally falling apart? Sure, you may be like me and be great at coping. However, coping only lasts so long. What happens when the lights are off and the crowd is gone? How you show up for YOU when no one is around is what distinguishes how we lead. 

Why Faith-Based Recovery Changes Everything

When I was a caregiver for my mother between 2007 and 2009, I had no idea that God was preparing me for what I now teach. I had to learn about nutrition to get her off psych meds that were causing suicidal thoughts. I had to understand proper movement techniques to help her manage HIV and MS. That experience forced me to slow down and truly see what healing looks like—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Years later, after three knee surgeries and two shoulder surgeries, I had to apply the same lessons to myself. As a former athlete and fitness leader in the military, I had worn my body down. But it wasn’t until I surrendered the need to force life that I truly began to heal. This journey began in 2019. This is when I began writing the first version of my book, Reclaim Your Life. 

Faith was the missing piece in my journey until that year. I had to get to a point where I had nothing left internally. I had to ask God to come in. Otherwise, I don't think I would have made it much longer. 

While that year was challenging, it set the stage for what I would need a few years later, when once again things around me seemed to be falling apart. People I thought had my back ended up taking advantage of me. My life partner put more effort into making me wrong that making me feel important and loved. Nevertheless, because I had been walking my faith journey for a few years, even through the hardest of times when those closest to me seemed to give up on me, God grabbed me and said, "I got you." He didn't give up on me. Instead, He brought me closer to Him. He brought me closer than I had ever been before. 

And that’s why everything I do now is rooted in God. Because when I allow Him to lead my healing, the transformation goes deeper than surface-level strategies. My transformation allowed for total restoration and pruning. It led me to become a more versatile person and better leader than I ever imagined. I get to lead teams on levels I never have. I am empowering others in ways I never imagined. I had to go through in order to get to. I realize now that when God calls us, He then equips us. We don't need to be perfect and we don't need to overdo people pleasing. We simply need to focus on pleasing God, taking care of ourselves, and understanding that we really aren't in control of anything else except ourselves. This truth gives peace. It settles us in many ways. I am now protecting my peace at all costs and that's with the faith I have in God. 

Introducing The Cortina Method (TCM)

I touched on this before, but the Cortina Method is a subconscious healing framework that allows your mind and body to release trauma without reliving it. I came in contact with its founder, Michael Cortina in August 2024. After my lengthy bouts in trauma therapy modalities, I was intrigued. I learned that this approach was non-invasive, gentle, effective, and best of all, faith-compatible. 

No more digging through painful memories. No more re-traumatizing experiences. Just a safe, guided process that allows your subconscious to let go of what’s holding you back—so you can finally move forward in peace.

I will admit, I was a bit skeptical. However, experiencing it proved to me the research. I am now a complete fan. I even went as far as to become a certified TCM practitioner so I could share it with others. 

I use TCM in my coaching to help clients reconnect with purpose, release limiting beliefs, and align their leadership with God’s vision for their lives. If clients have untapped trauma, we resolve that in the beginning before we try to go into time balancing, self-care, nutrition, or exercise. Sometimes, we have to reprogram in order to get further in life. TCM does just that - reprograms the subconscious mind in 1-2 "visits." 

The Science Supports the Spiritual

“Spirituality appears to play a significant role in recovery from traumatic events by providing hope, meaning, and a sense of connection to something greater than oneself.”
— Koenig, H. G. (2023), Spirituality in Trauma Recovery, National Library of Medicine

This confirms what I’ve lived and what I coach:
Healing isn’t just about coping. It’s about connecting—to your Creator, your calling, and your next chapter.

Faith. Healing. Legacy.

Every decision I’ve made—good, bad, or somewhere in between—has shaped the way I coach and the way I lead. My biggest breakthrough came when I stopped trying to force life and started trusting God. I have vowed to continue giving Him the pen so He can continue writing my story. When I take the pen, I mess it all up. When He has the pen, it's much more peaceful and leads me exactly where I need to be. He is the author of my story and the author of yours. The question is, will we give Him the pen or will we keep falling flat on our faces? I got tired of being on my face in a negative way. Hence, my decision to keep giving Him the pen - everyday. 

I now ask Him for direction in everything. And while some might call that “crazy,” I call it obedience. Because even when the risks are real, I trust that if God is in it, He will make a way. I remember thinking others were "crazy" for this way of thinking. Now I completely get it. It's not just a way for more. It's the ONLY way for me. 

Call to Action: Your Turn

If you’re tired of being stuck, overwhelmed, or reactive…
If you know there’s more in you but something’s holding you back…
If you want to lead your life and business from a place of healing, clarity, and peace…

Then I invite you to take the next step.

Book a free discovery call with me and learn more about The Cortina Method at www.ladyjempowers.com/offers.

Let’s stop striving and start healing—so we can lead boldly and build legacies that last.

Together, we can do more.

Stay blessed, my friends! Join our community and be surrounded by others on a similar journey!